I Just Can't Wait to Be King
Today I did two things I've done many a time before. One was cry in public. The second was fall asleep on a park bench. The former activity was pretty standard except for the guy who offered me a hit of his joint upon seeing me weep. "I don't normally share, but you look like you need it," he proposed. Thank you, stranger. In a hauntingly similar fashion to my mother you have mastered the art of the backhanded compliment. The second activity was also pretty standard except this time it was on a park bench that's also a swing!!! I know what you're wondering: Jose, how did you manage to both cry and fall asleep on a swinging park bench? Both of those tasks are challenging in different ways due to those settings. I know what else you're wondering: why are you sleeping on park benches? Also how have you fallen asleep on a park bench more than once? Don't you have a home?
The answer to your first question is sheer will. Much like a baby if I need to cry or sleep, I will find a way. Don't you worry, I cried for a very short amount of time, because while I probably shouldn't allow myself to feel self-conscious about a stranger who smokes in public parks watching me cry, my brain found a way. My brain is awesome like that.
The answer to your second question is a combination of me never being at home and an affinity for being a vagabond. I even wore my overalls today. I like to think the second trait comes from my father who is currently living illegally in a vacant home in Queens. What a guy. (If you're a cop who's somehow reading this, he has squatter's rights!!!!!!).
For clarification, when I say affinity for being a vagabond I mean less like an actual homeless person but more like a Newsie. Yeah. Like a Newsie. Just the right amount of dirt on my face for you to know I've been through it but also have fabulous cheekbones and a high, healthy belt somehow unaffected by malnutrition. A belt so great I also lose my dialect when I access it.
Anyways, I started this post hoping to get to something poignant about how post-grad is hard but that the universe has a plan and that I'll look back at my job bussing tables at the Meatball Shop as one of the best chapters of my life, but then I remember I accidentally dropped a knife with tomato sauce on the back of a guys shirt and I had to wipe it down with club soda in front of everyone and I think, probably not. It's the circle of life!!!*
*A reference to my other job at a dance studio where I'm currently en route to lay down new marley for a Lion King on Broadway rehearsal so the performers who make 7 times as much as I do don't hurt their precious Equity ankles.
The answer to your first question is sheer will. Much like a baby if I need to cry or sleep, I will find a way. Don't you worry, I cried for a very short amount of time, because while I probably shouldn't allow myself to feel self-conscious about a stranger who smokes in public parks watching me cry, my brain found a way. My brain is awesome like that.
The answer to your second question is a combination of me never being at home and an affinity for being a vagabond. I even wore my overalls today. I like to think the second trait comes from my father who is currently living illegally in a vacant home in Queens. What a guy. (If you're a cop who's somehow reading this, he has squatter's rights!!!!!!).
For clarification, when I say affinity for being a vagabond I mean less like an actual homeless person but more like a Newsie. Yeah. Like a Newsie. Just the right amount of dirt on my face for you to know I've been through it but also have fabulous cheekbones and a high, healthy belt somehow unaffected by malnutrition. A belt so great I also lose my dialect when I access it.
Anyways, I started this post hoping to get to something poignant about how post-grad is hard but that the universe has a plan and that I'll look back at my job bussing tables at the Meatball Shop as one of the best chapters of my life, but then I remember I accidentally dropped a knife with tomato sauce on the back of a guys shirt and I had to wipe it down with club soda in front of everyone and I think, probably not. It's the circle of life!!!*
*A reference to my other job at a dance studio where I'm currently en route to lay down new marley for a Lion King on Broadway rehearsal so the performers who make 7 times as much as I do don't hurt their precious Equity ankles.
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